Friday, January 27, 2012

Well Bully For You

It's illegal to beat up little kids. It's probably illegal to even think about beating up little kids. In fact, beating up little kids, beside being illegal, would probably make me a big mean bully, which would make me exactly like the kids that I would want to beat up.

As a parent, there is nothing more difficult than knowing that your child is being bullied. What do you do about it? How do you react? How do you fix it? How do you console your kid?

The thing is I spent two years in a Master's program learning all about kids and bullying. I know about bullying. Playground bullying, bullying in the classroom, cyber-bullying. I know the steps to take. I know what to tell the parents. What I don't know is what to do when it is my own kid. What to do when it is happening in my own neighborhood.

I can't move. I've thought about it. Beside running away really not being the best problem solver and really not teaching my son how to  confront and deal with problems, it is an expensive solution and I don't think we'd be able to unload this house on anyone in this economy anyway.

We've tried talking to the parents. Parents who used to be great friends. Parents who don't feel that there is a problem. Parents who feel that we are the problem for even bringing up. Unfortunately, because of the circumstances, that relationship has deteriorated to nothing. It just makes me so sad.

I understand that my son is younger. I understand that we do not allow him to do certain things or play certain games. I understand that there is an age difference. And this difference may keep him from playing Call of Duty on the XBox, but it shouldn't keep him from bouncing on a trampoline. There is nothing more heartbreaking to a parent than when all the kids in the neighborhood kids make a plan with your son there, yell goodbye to your kid, and go into a backyard and play. There is nothing more heartbreaking than when your kid, who can hear the kids playing, see them bouncing up and  down over the fence, looks at you and says, "Well I guess no one likes me anymore". There is nothing more heartbreaking than when your kid is heartbroken.

I just want it to stop. I just want to restore peace. I want things to go back to the way they were when a two and a half year age difference wasn't so big. I want to go back to how it was when we were like one big family. Before my son started being excluded. Before I dreaded weekends. Before I started praying for weekend rain.

So tell me parents? What would you do? How would you handle this situation? How would you make it right for your child?

1 comment:

  1. Are there any activities or sports you could get him involved in that aren't with these kids? Something A would be excited about, and make new friends in? Or you could just kick one of the kids when nobodies looking. Nobody would believe them anyway.